A Scouser Commenting on King Charles's visit to Donald Trump
I'm not sure what he said but I think we're on the same page...
Lad, I’m tellin’ ye, I’m lookin’ at the grid on this orange weapon and I’m proper chocka, I’m actually fumin. Look at the state of that! It’s a 24-carat, world-class show. He’s stood there on the grass lookin' like a giant, meltin' Wotsit in a suit he’s definitely nicked off a fella twice his size—propa heavy vibes, like he’s just crawled out of a skip and thinks he’s the main man.
Who’s he think he is, lad? That’s the King! You don’t go marchin’ ten yards ahead of him like a total beaut who’s lost his marras after a heavy night in town and is lookin’ for the nearest chippy. He’s got zero home-baked, zero class, just a massive, shouty meff with a lid like a bag of shredded wheat that’s been left out in the rain to rot. It’s a shambles, an absolute ozzy, a proper stink.
And the touchin’! Is he for real? Goin’ in for the back-slap like he’s just won a tenner on the pucker at the bookies and he’s tryin' to act the big 'un. Get your paws off, lad! You’re stood there with the Monarch, not some soft lad outside the offy hopin’ for a spare smoke. He’s got no bin-man, no shame, just pure kyte spewin' out every time he opens his grid. He’s a joker, a proper divvy, a total weapon.
He’s bangin’ on about "history" and "courage" and "the great people," and the King is just lookin’ at him like he’s a smell he can’t shift off his shoe. It’s heavy, honestly. The fella hasn’t got a clue. He’s a wool from head to toe, actin’ like he’s the boss of the world when he’s just a massive, shouty divvy in a red tie that’s long enough to trip him up.
Honestly, if he showed his face 'round Scotty Road or the docks actin' like that, he’d be binned inside thirty seconds. No one’s got time for a scally who thinks he’s royalty 'cos he’s got a gold toilet and a loud mouth. He’s a divvy, a weapon, and a massive soft lad all rolled into one orange mess.
Tell him to scaddle, lad. Get him in the bin where he belongs. Absolute joker. Stick a lid on it, Donny, you’re makin' me swerve the whole planet. Propa stink, that. Just a total meff show. Get him binned! I’m done with him, he’s an absolute beaut. Proper boss show of how not to behave, that. Get him outta here!
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